Happy Birthday To Me

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday to meeeee, happy birthday to me.

I open my eyes this morning to a little face carrying a breakfast tray. She has made me 2 slices of toast and a cup of tea.. Strong tea, just the way I like it. How do you tell your baby that you just don’t “do” breakfast in bed.

I smile though my sleepy eyes, and try to sit myself up. I don’t usually face the world until after I lay in for at least15 minutes and then have a long hot shower. Then, and only then am I ready to face the noise, the reality of another day and am I able to look at food. Ok, I lay there smiling for a while, maybe she will go and I can slip it to the dog who is looking hopeful at the door. Nope, she stands there, all dressed, ready for school ( so I can’t tell her to go) watching as I take a bite. Oh dear, it’s smothered in butter. Swallow…swallow!! She sees the look of triumph and mistakes it as pleasure. “Lovely Em, thanks Honey”. I think I have the best daughter in the entire world. She is the picture of perfection, and makes me so happy. Last night, she baked me a cake. For me. A birthday cake.  I haven’t even baked a cake for my own Mother and my 9 year old made me one. I feel so blessed. How is it that good things just keep coming to me?

Then in trot the boys, with their handmade (in the last 5 minutes) cards for me and boisterous bounding on the bed and kisses and cuddles. Could it get better than this? Oh yes, read on. Andrew (yes the annoying,  rude crude and disgusting husband.. the one who doesn’t “do” anniversary presents or valentines day) comes out with his card for me. Oh my goodness, he did a good job. It was one of those soppy lovey dovey cards… the most romantic ones… the ones i just honestly LOVE… yes, all the beautiful words, but he goes ones better and changes some of the words, (and not as you would typically think of Andrew to make it humorous) no, he changed the ” our hopes and dreams will someday (to) have come true ” Oh yes, today will be a good day.

I have cards from family, and messages on my phone. My friends come by work and give me gifts… oh my goodness, I feel so special!  And yes Chris, I am closer to 40 than 30 now, but I feel so wonderful.  Mum brought me lunch and more prezzies, including chocolate, which is almost gone already.

Tonight we went to Showcase. I wanted a night out with all my kids, and Josh was performing in the first act so I thought he could come and sit with us for the rest of it, or for as long as he could. I love to see the kids doing their act. The Holland Street School kids touch my heart, and I find it difficult not to cry. It’s sort of bittersweet and I am not sure how to explain. Part of me looks at Josh up there and sees the disability, his challenges, and maybe even a bit of what he can never be. My heart shakes when he cries out, thinking he is up there on display, that others might see just the disability and I pray that he gets through the act without a display. Then there is the other part of me.. the stronger part, the part that sees my little boy, my eldest child and loves him unconditionally and is so proud of him. The part that wants to jump and down in my seat and say “That’s MY boy, isn’t he just wonderful?” That little boy, along with his school friends at Holland St have the ability to touch people in a way that you cannot fake, you cannot learn, you cannot buy. They are genuine, true and refreshing. So when the tears come to my eyes, and I hold them back, smile and know that this is my family, and I am a very lucky person indeed.

Happy Birthday to me!

Advertisement